Life Among the Never-Winged

Once upon a time I was writing a book called, "Just Another Love Letter", about angels behaving badly. Now I just quietly ask myself each day, "What the hell am I doing?"

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Location: The Rocky Mountain Empire, United States

My friends always knew I was going to hell. My only hope is that God likes good jokes and bad redheads.

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  • Friday, September 29, 2006

    Decisions, Decisions

    Ok. The parents are at the airport, the boyos are off playing, and I am typing on my spankin' new laptop from the comfort of my bed.

    I took advantage of the free babysitting and went for my annual exam. My PRN had some bad news for me, though it wasn't really news, since I was expecting it.

    My endometriosis is back in full swing and gaining. For those of you who aren't familiar with the disease, it is endometrial tissue that grows and spreads cancer-like, in the pelvic region. It swells and bleeds and irritates the body, whose defense is to create scar tissue around the rogue tissue. It is very painful, and can lead to all sorts of problems like infertility (been there done that) and damaged and fused organs, not to mention debilitating pain as it progresses.

    So. I've got some decisions to make.


    Should I:

    A) Go with straightforward surgery which is the traditional route but that can leave painful scar tissue, and will have to be repeated in five years -- less if I'm unlucky.

    B) Go with the new chemo treatment, whose side-effects are nausea, lethargy, eye damage, limb weakness, hot-flashes, bone-density loss (osteoporosis) mood swings, depression and other shit I can't remember. Oh, and the co-pay is $140 per injection. I need a minimum of six. And its effects last about 5 years as well.

    C) Go with both, chemo first.

    D) Try acupuncture and herbs.


    Insurance covered the surgery before. But that was under the umbrella of infertility treatments, and the endo was actually an incidental discovery.

    My doc and PRN are pushing for the chemo. Me, I'm not so sure.

    Never tried acupuncture.

    Any suggestions?


    I'm beat. My parents' visit was exhausting. More about that later. I'm not really feeling much right now.

    12 people left me a love letter:

    Blogger Schmoopie wrote in a love letter...

    Hmm... Lots to decide. I would try the chemo anjd see how you react to it. Chemo would prevent any rogue cells from becoming cancerous. Side effects for it always suck but the end results might be better in the long-run. Have they thought of a complete hysterectomy? Bad, I know, but maybe an alternative to chemo?

    7:47 PM, September 29, 2006  
    Blogger meno wrote in a love letter...

    The side effects of the chemo sound pretty bad, but so does surgery, and to have to repeat it.
    I wish i knew what to tell you other than I'm sorry.

    9:31 PM, September 29, 2006  
    Blogger D_Man wrote in a love letter...

    Endomeouch!

    I don't know enough to offer suggestions. Other than do your research, but remember that your doctor has your best interests in mind.

    3:38 AM, September 30, 2006  
    Blogger Des_Moines_Girl wrote in a love letter...

    ...sigh...

    Very sorry to hear you're having trouble again. The good news is you have options. The only advice I can offer is to talk to your doctor.

    A hysterectomy would certainly solve the problem permenantly but it is major surgery and comes with its own risks.

    I'll be thinking about you. Call me if you wanna talk.

    8:01 AM, September 30, 2006  
    Blogger amusing wrote in a love letter...

    well, yes, I do wish we could go out for a drink. Sounds as though you could use one. Maybe two. sigh.

    This seems as though I am sending you off to Oz, but I would take the yellow brick road and go inquire of Dr. Mama at her blogspot. She's just gone through a spell debunking medical myths for her readers. Offer this up as a topic. It might be an interesting thread. http://doctormama.blogspot.com/

    3:35 PM, September 30, 2006  
    Blogger Esereth wrote in a love letter...

    Oh hon do what the doctor says. Research and ask around if it would make you feel better, but really, a doctor is just going to know more than any of us. As for the money, you aren't going to find many more worthy causes to spend it on.

    As for alternative medicine, I'd only be interested in that if you had fantastic hard evidence that it would work.

    5:31 PM, September 30, 2006  
    Blogger Jonathon S.B. Tiercel wrote in a love letter...

    Nancy - My sister went through this as well... she opted for the hysterectomy.... which made her go through menopause and she had to take estrogen pills to keep herself going... She was in her twenties when she went through it...Give me a call if there is anything we can do...

    JT

    4:19 PM, October 01, 2006  
    Blogger Julie wrote in a love letter...

    ah sister chick,

    I cannot tell you what to do...I only offer you this...

    2 years ago acupuncture was the only thing that worked for me after months of tests and traditional doctors appointments (for a different ailment, that's why I can't speak to yours). My primary care physician actually recommended it. (I go to my traditional doctor for some things and my acupunturist for others)
    And my acupuncturist is great...she would also never treat something that she thinks needs "western" medical attention. So you want to do your research and get the right person.

    5:36 PM, October 01, 2006  
    Blogger Georgia wrote in a love letter...

    Okay, Mrs. Question here. First of all, at the age of 35 why would you want to keep your "female parts" and go through cemo and all that entails? Why not just have a complete hysterectomy and rid yourself of all that stuff that is making you miserable? I had a partial hysterectomy in May (they left the ovaries because they couldn't reach 'em vaginally) and I'll tell you what all my friends and relatives told me, "You'll feel SOOOO much better after it's overwith." And they were soooo right. At the same time they can "lift" your bladder and that is a blessing as well. So why keep it and suffer? I wish you the best no matter what you choose. Keep us posted!

    4:54 PM, October 02, 2006  
    Blogger Nancy Dancehall wrote in a love letter...

    Thank you so much, everybody. It's very difficult for me to talk about things like this, because I don't want to come off as a whiner. There are plenty of women (and men) out there going through much worse. But it does help to get it out. I'm back to feeling again, and that's a good thing.

    Thanks one and all for your suggestions.

    Schmoop and Georgia (welcome back) A total hysterectomy is the Hiroshima of alternatives. What sort of emotional side-effects did you have, Georgia, if any? My biggest concern with chemical treatments and/or a hysterectomy is the depression that accompanies them. I skirt that black hole as it is, and I don't think I can afford to do anything that would draw me closer to it.

    Es, DMG, and D-Man: I have the beeeest doc. She walks on water. The first chance I have to talk to her one on one is Halloween (heh). I'm certainly going to listen to her. My biggest problem with the chemo treatment is that it will throw me into a temporary menopause, and my hormones are only now getting back to something resembling normal, after ten years. I don't want to mess with them. DMG, thanks for the phone call on Sunday!

    Meno and Amusing: Thanks for your sympathy and support, ladies. Amusing I've been to Doctormama's site, and I'll probably send her an email. Whatcha drinking?

    Julie: O knows a good acupuncturist who told him endo is extremely difficult to treat, but he's willing to give it a go. I think I might try it in conjunction with everything else. Thanks for the feedback on that.

    JT: First, congrats on the new house! How did your sister handle the mood swings, or did she have any? That is my #1 biggest concern with all of this.


    Thanks again, everybody. I'll be checking back with these comments again as long as the dialogue holds up.

    2:09 PM, October 03, 2006  
    Blogger Bud wrote in a love letter...

    Sorry I missed this before. Get a book called Alkalize or Die. You can probably keep cancer from returning with this diet. But I think I'd go with the chemo too. The diet will keep it from returning. I'm a believer in holistic medicine and acupuncture. Not sure how useful it is to your condition, though. Keep us posted on that.

    6:06 AM, October 04, 2006  
    Blogger Nancy Dancehall wrote in a love letter...

    I've changed my diet the past few years and it has been amazing. The endo is incurable and will keep coming back, but I think diet has prevented it from coming back sooner.

    9:43 AM, October 05, 2006  

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